Thoughts at the Office

  • I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

  • I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

  • Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

  • Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.

  • Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time, chances are you won't be needing him again.

  • I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.

  • Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

  • My reality check bounced.

  • On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

  • I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier.

  • Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

  • Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

  • Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.

  • A pat on the back is only a few centimetres from a kick in the butt.

  • Don't be irreplaceable - if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

  • After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.

  • The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

  • You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

  • If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.


Back